Allez-Vous
Season 1, Episode 8
Written by Chris Pozzebon
Directed by Paul Fox
Synopsis: Moira and David try their hand at network marketing, Johnny attempts to obtain unemployment benefit, and Alexis struggles with Ted’s nice-guy personality.
Rating: ★★★☆☆
Anyone who has ever fallen for the myth that MLM (multi-level marketing) is a quick way to a fortune will be nodding and wincing ruefully during this episode. Supposedly, the profits you make from selling the product are as nothing compared with the riches that will roll in once you’ve begun recruiting your own ‘downline’ of sales representatives, from whose profits you then cream off a percentage – with those ‘upline’ of you also taking a cut. Of course, to allow for everyone in the hierarchy receiving a share of the income, the products themselves have to be overpriced which makes them tough to sell. And the person who recruited you has probably already targeted most of your friends-and-family network, leaving slim pickings for you. If all this makes you suspect that I must have been burned by an MLM scheme in the past... well, you’d be right. I can’t help wondering if this episode was inspired by the practices of the company I briefly dabbled with; I won’t name them, but let’s just say that ‘Allez-Vous’ sounds suspiciously like ‘aloe vera’.
Justine St Pierre, an old acquaintance of Moira’s, has sent her what appears to be a large gift box of cosmetics. Moira is initially thrilled: ‘One of my dear friends is finally reaching out, and you know what? I knew it would be Justine.’ It doesn’t last; when David pulls a leaflet from the box which reads ‘Congratulations on your Allez-Vous starter kit’, her face drops in an instant. ‘That frigid whore,’ she mutters balefully.
Allez-Vous is evidently Justine’s own MLM company, or ‘scam’ as Moira labels it. Nevertheless, David is enchanted by the promotional material, with its promise of winning a champagne Audi; and the two of them proceed to watch a hilarious video presented by Justine herself in front of a greenscreened backdrop of a tropical beach. Sipping a cocktail from a coconut shell, she spouts meaningless sales talk while promising to let eager reps in on her ‘tips and tricks’ that will guarantee them success. Moira isn’t taken in but reluctantly decides that, since Johnny is working hard to find income for the family, ‘the least we can do is try to sell this garbage’.
To this end, mother and son host a ‘luncheon’ for the women of the town, where they hammily act out the pretence of having been caught in the middle of tidying away the products. They then proceed to hand them around for inspection, all the while clumsily dropping marketing buzzwords into the conversation (‘David! Now is not the time to discuss Allez-Vous’s preferred customer discounts!’).
The women’s response seems oddly muted, even awkward. It turns out, of course, that they’ve all previously been suckered in by Allez-Vous and, after forking out a small fortune for their starter kits, have quickly come to realise the futility of trying to make money by selling the products to each other. Moira and David’s dumbfounded expressions as the penny drops are a picture.
The scene is played almost entirely for laughs, none cheaper than David’s orange face resulting from the liberal application of Allez-Vous’s sunless bronzer. It also features the episode’s only appearance of Stevie, who is sadly underused, her contribution being limited to two brief lines.
As with the previous episode, there is meatier fare to be found in the secondary storylines. First of all we have Johnny’s efforts to claim unemployment benefit. There is something rather touching about his reluctance to reveal what he’s doing, initially to Moira and then to Roland. Johnny Rose is a proud man, and admitting he needs a financial handout from the government is a source of considerable embarrassment, even shame. Equally touching is the support he gets from Moira: ‘I think you’re brave,’ she tells him. ‘There’s something very masculine about the way you’re taking control of the situation.’
Something that doesn’t get talked about much is the way that Johnny – generally seen as the most straightforward and honest of the Rose clan – often displays a devious, manipulative side when he needs someone to do something for him. Here, for example, lacking transport to get to his appointment in Elmdale and having lost patience with Roland’s string of conditions for the loan of his truck, Johnny attempts to dupe Bob into letting him borrow a used car from outside his garage under the pretence that he is considering buying it and wants to take it for a test drive. (Fans rewatching the show will be pleased to note the first appearance here of the much-loved ‘Bob jog’.) The car breaks down and Johnny has to swallow his pride and call Roland for help. En route to Elmdale he caves in under pressure from the inquisitive mayor and tells him where he’s going and why.
Having Roland tag along turns out to be a blessing in disguise, as the initially unhelpful benefits supervisor turns out to be an old flame; he’s able to sweet-talk her into believing that Johnny was formerly employed as his general dogsbody and therefore qualifies for a payout. To Roland’s evident enjoyment, Johnny is forced to humiliate himself by claiming that he used to do menial jobs for him, even cleaning his shoes. The overlapping crosstalk between the two men in this scene is comedy gold, as is the moment when a stoney-faced Johnny reaches up and removes Roland’s hand from around his shoulders.
In parallel with all this we have the developing relationship between Alexis and Ted. It’s unclear how much time has passed since they first met and started dating in the previous episode, but things seem to have moved on remarkably quickly. In place of coy flirting, they're now having a lovers’ tiff over the fact that Ted is too polite to send back his breakfast in the café even though it’s come with home fries instead of the toast he ordered. (Alexis, we learn, is on ‘the first day of a cleanse’, meaning that her breakfast appears to consist of a single stalk of parsley.)
Having briefly shown their faces at the Allez-Vous event, Alexis is immediately ready to leave; Ted feels this would be rude as Moira made a point of inviting them. ‘Just say no for one time, Ted,’ pleads a frustrated Alexis. Ted has finally had enough and, in a surprising turn, he announces he’s leaving – alone. ‘Now you get all decisive-y?’ she responds, open-mouthed.
It leads to a sweet scene where Alexis comes to find Ted back in the café and apologises. She admits she’s not used to dating nice guys and, moreover, worries that her family have traditionally viewed niceness as a weakness to be exploited. She encourages him to role-play saying mean things about them, and reacts positively – that is, until he goes too far and ventures a few home truths about herself, at which point she silences him with the wag of a finger. The message is clear: a little more assertiveness from Ted is welcome, provided strict boundaries are observed.
Overall, an unremarkable episode, enjoyable and well put together without being particularly memorable. It’s elevated by some great comedy playing from Eugene Levy and Chris Elliott in the unemployment office scene, and the promising addition of a little meat to the bones of Alexis and Ted’s courtship.
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Moira-ism: ‘She’s an angry drunk, but we were always close.’
Fun fact: this episode marks the first time Alexis says ‘Ew, David!’ The phrase has become indelibly associated with the character, so it’s surprising to learn that, in total, throughout all six seasons of the show, she only says it three times.
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Previous episode: Turkey Shoot
Next episode: Carl’s Funeral